Disaster date at Portland Art Museum

Disaster date at Portland Art Museum

After 22 years of being in a couple, to my horror, I find myself single. 

So, a date at the art museum sounded like a perfect way to break the ice of dating again. I was using an online dating site (with photos) and after a few texts and 2 longish phone calls, we set a date for the museum. The phone calls went well, he seemed bright and “woke” to gender issues. He wasn’t pushy and seemed concerned for my comfort on the date. He seemed like a great person to explore a museum with. 

On the appointed morning, I arrived and I was disappointed that he looked like he had dressed for yard work and hadn’t brushed his hair. But I am not overly hung up on looks so I let that slide. He made sure to tell me that I would be buying my own ticket to the museum as we walked towards the doors, I consider myself modern so I did so with no hesitation. It caused me to think maybe he has money issues, after asking me out he didn’t even offer to buy me a coffee. 

Inside, he told me to pick where I wanted to go and he would just go along with me. This could not have been farther from the truth.  He spent more time circling the same paintings in the first room than I did. I understand wanting not to be rushed, so I sat on a bench and waited for him to join me. It was nice soaking up the art like that and I was not in a hurry at all. I was a bit put off that he didn’t at least check in with me more often but I was still trying to be open minded. When he finally joined me on the bench he acted like he didn’t want to sit near me and the conversation dragged. What happened to the good conversationalist person that I talked to on the phone? 

Then the exhibit was split on two floors, so I chose to take the elevator to favor my bad knee and instead of accompanying me and talk about what we had seen, he choose to take the stairs. Well, at this point there is no doubt, this is one of the worst dates I have ever had. He seems completely disinterested in me as a person.  A bright articulate person should be able to enjoy a museum with another bright person even if they were not physically attracted to them. But that was clearly not in his skill set.  

Luckily, I got off on the wrong floor and ended up in the impressionist section that I really enjoyed before finding my way back to the main exhibit.  He found me as soon as I got off the elevator and asked where I was, I explained I got lost and told him about the impressionists. He said, “Great, I am done with this room and I will go there”. I agreed he should and off he went again.  When I neared the end of the exhibit we were originally looking at, he found me again and told me he was headed to another floor and suggested I go to a different exhibit all together. I said "good idea".

 I finished that exhibit then I sat and enjoyed an iced tea on the outside porch listening to random people play an outdoor piano. After I finished my drink, I just walked to my car and left. I don’t believe he even noticed I was gone and never even texted me to ask where I was. He told me often his dates were “one and done” dates and that is why he didn’t want to meet me over coffee. I fully understand that now. I left a message on the dating app telling him I hope he finds what he is looking for but it was clearly not me. 

/Block

So far, I don’t like modern dating.